Feathers of Flight
As she looks into the mirror in front of her, she wonders if she is really the same person, she was twenty years ago. All she could see in herself; years past was the fire within her begging to be released. Burning angst at the unfair and cruel world around her. The turbulent expression could not come out of her in ways which were helpful to her situation. Instead, she sought the only release that she knew she could control, her own physical pain. The sadness of the child who was never supposed to be and the anxiety of never escaping the harsh reality of life.
Thrown off the cliff side nest of her father at 18, her escape came. Suitcase packed, she began walking, not realizing how truly lucky she was. The grandparents of her friend offered her a place to stay. It was right there, a quarter mile from the cliff. The cliff that if in another time, she would have been thrown from as an unwanted infant. Thankfully she had time to grow her tattered wings before she was hurled.
She has stumbled. Over and over she has tripped. Being a klutz with wings lacking sufficient feathers will cause this. The biggest mistake was asking for the same vultures to let her child grow wings in the same nest. His feathers had not come in and hers were constantly getting snagged and ripped from her body as she kept falling towards the sea below. The goal of this question was to grow her wings. The problem came when her feathers came in, lush and expressive in their flourish, the vultures have tattered his wings in the same way they did hers. His feathers, still growing are being plucked while he sleeps.
Her fire still burns within her, but she her found her expression. It isn’t ripping the air to shreds with anger expressed through her talons. No. She has never physically expressed her ire. She has painted, she has drawn, and she has written. Her fears come to fruition in her nightmares as she wakes up in a cold sweat. Her happiness is expressed through her spoken words, only giving positive to those around her. The negative side of her being kept within because that would mean she is bringing negativity to another’s ear.
As she continues to peer into the mirror, she sees inside her soul and knows that her vow to herself has been kept. She will never resent someone for their actions, no matter their effect on her soul. That would mean wasting her thoughts on someone who doesn’t care about her. If they truly cared about her, they would not have hurt her so deeply to begin with. She would never have felt like the child who was never supposed to happen and would never have felt caged to begin with.
